An Open Letter to the Chicago Cubs

To Whom It May Concern:

Hello, I’m Wally. I love the Cubs. I hate the Cubs. As a result of mismanagement of both funds and talent, this season was awful. I’m sure you can attest. I don’t sit in the locker room, but I doubt many of the Cubbies were proud of the 2010 season. $140 million in payroll should get you more than “last” in the Central. (Yea, so it’s the Pirates, but they OWN 6th place.) You gave D Lee a chance at the playoffs, that was a great move. Good luck to him. You still believe in Samardjzia, that’s commendable. There are a few things that could save this squad and propel it into gasp contention next year, and it won’t cost you much, here we go:

• Big Z has to go: This is a no-brainer. I understand you’ve paid him millions, he hasn’t delivered. Actually he has, he leads the league in Front Office headaches. Cut the cord and let him go. He is poison in Chicago.
• Mess around with the lineup: Move Soriano back to second. Hoffpauir at First. Call up Bryan LaHair (.308/.385/.942) and stick him in Left. Marlon in Center, put Kosuke in Right. Use Koyie Hill and GeoSoto as a tandem, let them both develop, and get rid of the unproductive one. Starlin Castro? Lead off. Here’s a potential starting lineup: Castro, Byrd, Soriano, Ramirez, LaHair (6’5″, 240), Hill/Soto, Hoffpauir, Fukudome, Pitcher.
• Make a splash with a Manager signing: No, this does not mean offer Joe Torre ten zillion dollars for one year, or trying to take Girardi away from the Bronx. I mean, a real splash, something that nobody really does anymore. Hire a coach with only college experience. I have somebody in mind, and just let your mind wander: Pat Murphy. He’s firey, can handle young players, and I think it’d be the kind of jump-start that could get the team and fans excited.
• Drop Big Z: For emphasis.

With love,

Wally